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By Charlotte Lankard Recess, quiet time, a yoga class and a nap all have something in common. They signify a need to stop, rest and renew. My father did this well. When I was a child, the church my father pastored was across the street from the parsonage where we lived. It was easy for him to come home for lunch, and then he would lie down for a nap before returning to his afternoon duties. Last week, in a workshop for physicians and other health professionals, Dr. Judith Orloff, physician, educator and author, reminded us of the importance of retreating for a time to avoid burnout and to be better at helping people. Orloff said she believes we are each given a certain amount of energy for the day, and it is important we use it wisely. She cautioned against the belief that any of us can be all things to all people. "All we are required to do," she says, "is what we can -- and that is enough." When we are responsible at setting limits and conserving our energy, we are able to enjoy life. If you pay attention, you can know when you've gone too long without a time of rest and renewal. Perhaps it is when you can't remember the last time you had a moment to yourself or you realize you don't laugh as much as you used to. Or maybe it is when you seem to be rushing through your day and feel as if you're running on empty. You may find yourself wishing you could move your life in a different direction, but all you seem to have time for is taking care of others' needs. And when you reach the end of the day, with no energy left, you spend evenings and weekends zoned out in front of the television. Notice when you are feeling disconnected -- without an inner center, or when you feel an unquenchable inner yearning, or when your heart feels closed. Those are the times when you find yourself thinking there should be more to life, but you don't know what it is or what to do about it. If you think there are not enough hours in the day to finish what needs to be done, much less take some time for yourself, consider a book by psychologist Rachel Harris, "20-Minute Retreats: Revive Your Spirit in Just Minutes a Day with Simple, Self-Led Practices." She believes the purpose of a daily retreat is to help you stay centered no matter what is going on. It allows you to "think before you speak words you'll regret, to choose your actions with clear intention and awareness, and to remember once again who you really are." Charlotte Lankard is a marriage and family therapist in private practice with Baptist Counseling Associates and director of the James L. Hall Center for Mind, Body and Spirit at Integris. |